Tag: Soccer Shorts

Frankly, Mr Robinson

“Aim for the sky and you’ll reach the ceiling. Aim for the ceiling and you’ll stay on the floor”. Bill Shankly

Carl Robinson will almost certainly be back as coach of the Vancouver Whitecaps next season.

After all, he’s a safe pair of hands who can do enough to get them into the playoffs most years and who is happy to talk down the potential of his own team to ensure nobody gets too upset whenever they fall short or fail to perform.

But if there’s one metaphor to sum up his tenure thus far it’s those “ceilings” spoken of by Bill Shankly.

There’s the ceiling of his own coaching ability which is limited to one particular style of play no matter who is in the squad.

The illusion that a forward of genuine quality and a dynamic creative presence would allow Robinson to play more attractive football has been shattered by the realization that Fredy Montero and Yordy Reyna are still playing in a team that is specifically designed to isolate them.

Neither does it matter who is touted as a box to box saviour because Robinson won’t want them to play as a box to box saviour. He will want them to sit deep and stifle the midfield.

And in every game of consequence he has been out coached to an alarming degree, largely because the way he sets up the team is so predictable.

Don’t give away silly fouls near your own penalty area, don’t push too many men forward and the Whitecaps just won’t be able to beat you.

There’s the ceiling his style of play imposes on young players.

It can be argued that defenders such as Parker and Nerwinski have flourished under Robinson but not a single young attacking player has improved.

What that means for the future of Alphonso Davies is cause for concern.

Is playing in a team that doesn’t want possession good for his long-term growth? Is playing in a team that seems to value his defensive contribution over all else beneficial? Is playing in a team in which the coach constantly thinks the opposition are to be feared no matter who they are or where the game is played good for his confidence?

The answer to all those questions is “No” by the way.

There’s the ceiling of how much the club can grow under his stewardship.

It’s true that Robinson’s main focus has to be on getting results but the first leg against Seattle was so devoid of ambition that very few of those “Whitecaps curious” attendees among the 27,000 will be coming back.

Play conservative football and win and perhaps something limited but substantial can be built. Play conservative football and lose and the foundations will begin to shift.

Right now the Whitecaps are at the limit of how far they can go in terms of crowd numbers with this style of play (actually, that limit may have already been reached last season and this year could be the start of the decline).

Whatever the case, more of the same next season will see those numbers dissipate just a little bit more.

There’s the ceiling of his relationship with the supporters.

It’s kind of odd that Robinson, who clearly has a very good relationship with his players, has never really connected with the Whitecaps fan base.

Part of that is because he treats all interviews and press conferences as a way of either saying nothing or as a way of dissembling.

And again, just like his preferred style of play, that’s his prerogative.

But if you don’t engage with the fans by acknowledging their concerns or speaking in a way that elicits or invites empathy then those poor performances are so much tougher to get through.

It could be that his whole “we are up against it” philosophy precludes him from this kind of engagement or it could be that he regards his own knowledge of the game to be so far above those who pay for tickets week in and week out that they don’t merit consideration.

But if Robinson displayed the same openness and willingness to engage with the fans as he does with an opposition player taking a throw in he might be given a little more slack when things go awry.

And finally there’s the ceiling of his own ambition.

Maybe he’s not to blame for this particular flaw because it could be the club ethos as a whole but the overwhelming sense is of a coach who once he’s reached a level he thinks is acceptable for the season regards anything else as simply a bonus.

From the moment the Whitecaps reached the playoffs this year Robinson began to tinker with team selection and tactics and lo and behold the performances dipped.

Instead of asking more of his players he asked less. He left in-form performers out of lineups and seemingly saw the final three games of the campaign as the chance to decide what his best eleven should be.

Which is kind of crazy once you really think about it.

Unsurprisingly any momentum was lost and we ended up watching the team turn in those two performances against Seattle.

So after four years of observing his body of work as a coach we can conclude that while Robinson really wants to win games and trophies he doesn’t really need to win them.

He’s more than happy to hit whatever preseason target the back or front office assign him and then explain with a smile that his players just aren’t as good as their opponents.

Despite all of the above though he will probably be back in 2018 and there will no doubt be talk of new signings and rumours of departures and then the preseason advertising campaign will proclaim how much everybody involved with the Whitecaps cares for the club and for the supporters and for the history.

And then this time next year Carl Robinson will once again be shrugging his shoulders and giving a “Well, what can you do?” grin while our Cascadian rivals celebrate in the background.

 

Vancouver Whitecaps lose: But look at the cute moose!

It was probably fitting that the Vancouver Whitecaps season should end with a whimper of a 2-0 defeat to the Seattle Sounders in the second leg of the Conference semi-final on Wednesday evening.

After all, Carl Robinson’s whole philosophy is based around making his team as tedious to watch as possible and he achieved the zenith of that ambition over these two games.

Although he must have been disappointed to see a half-hearted Christian Bolaños header count as the only shot on goal over the full 180 minutes when the perfect zero was so nearly on the cards.

What’s left to say?

If you don’t try to win games you won’t win games?

If you don’t think a Cascadian derby playoff series is reason to get your team fired up to score then what is?

Bringing on Davies and Shea who haven’t played ten minutes of good football between them in the last two months displayed typically poor in-game management?

A bizarre end to the season which saw the team lose any rhythm and cohesion due to a constant switching of personnel and tactics?

The belief that relying on “fine lines” is the only way to win games?

The lack of belief in players, constantly speaking of them as underdogs and asking them to play a style of football that sucks the life out of their creativity?

The mind numbing limits to any sense of ambition both on the field and off it?

I could go on, but there will be time enough for that and more over the coming weeks when we can consider whether the “fire Robbo” tweets of this evening are the wounded sighs of unhappy creatures or something containing more substance.

For now though it’s on to a Winter of player moves and speculation, which is always fun in itself I guess.

But how we must all wish we were back in the height of Summer, drinking a cold beer in our Whitecaps themed gazebo and dreaming of what might be.

But “what might be” always turns out to be an illusory stop on the road to “what is”.

But oh for a just a few more shots on goal!

Time for the Soccer Shorts player ratings.

Marinovic-5.5, Nerwinski-5, de Jong-6*, Waston-5.5, Parker-5.5-Nosa-5.5, Ghazal-6, Techera-4.5, Bolaños-5, Reyna-4, Montero-5 (Harvey-5)

 

Vancouver Whitecaps: Cue Fanfare

I wonder if anybody has ever walked away from a chess match and said ‘Wow! That was a real game of soccer”?

Almost certainly not because, you know, the comparison would be ridiculous.

But not when the situation is reversed apparently because whenever a really tedious game of football has been played somebody somewhere will opine that “it was a real chess match”.

Maybe sometimes they’ll even stretch to “that was one for the purists” but the chess match metaphor seems to be the main phrase to go to.

That’s not to say that some games can’t be genuinely interesting tactical battles with coaches switching formations and counter punching each other with every substitution, but let’s not try to pretend that Sunday’s 0-0 tie between the Vancouver Whitecaps and the Seattle Sounders fits into that category.

Straight from the first whistle both coaches set their team up not to concede rather than to score  and that didn’t change at all for the full ninety minutes plus change.

That’s hardly the famous Fischer vs Spassky “Alekhine’s Defence” game now is it?

One positive for the Whitecaps was that they were able to keep possession pretty well, notching up the most passes and highest completion rate of the season.

That probably undermines Robinson’s previous assertions that he just doesn’t have the players to play that kind of football but I don’t think anybody really took those claims at face value or were under any illusions about what kind of football the coach thinks is effective at this stage of his tenure.

It’s certainly possible that his caution will pay dividends in the return leg on Thursday evening and there must be fans of the Sounders who are equally frustrated about their own team’s unwillingness to push for what would have been a vital away goal.

So there’ll be a whole bunch of “what ifs” and “why didn’t yous?” once the dust has settled on this tie as a whole.

And that’s the thing with such a negative approach to any game.

If it works the fans are consoled by the result, but if it doesn’t work they are left with the sense that the team they root for and love has failed to step up to the plate when it really mattered.

And that’s a bitter taste to linger in the throat during the whole of the off-season.

 

Whitecaps hold Seattle to a scoreless draw!

Ha! That will teach all those fair weather fans who thought they’d go to an exciting game of playoff soccer a valuable lesson.

No way they’ll be back again next season and that means shorter lines at the concession stands for the more loyal supporters among us.

Cheers Robbo!

It does sometimes feel as though Carl Robinson has never seen a big game against a Cascadian rival in which he doesn’t want his team to fold up within themselves like an armadillo with anxiety issues and so it proved in the 0-0 tie with the Seattle Sounders at BC Place on Sunday evening.

A different coach may have decided to build on the exciting 5-0 win in midweek and a different coach may have decided to make use of the sellout and lively home crowd to send his team out all guns blazing for the first twenty minutes at least in an attempt to turn the home stadium into a cauldron of passionate fervour.

But Robinson isn’t that kind of coach and so we got the safety first approach we have grown to know and tolerate until it soon became painfully clear that neither team was going to take any real risk going forward at all.

Certainly without Reyna or Mezquida on the field Fredy Montero was back to his splendid isolation, staring in wonder at aimless high balls launched in his vague direction from somewhere in the back four.

Tony Tchani once again looked like a man who could walk into an Apple Store without being noticed and Brek Shea played like somebody who had never seen a football until the first whistle blew.

On two separate occasions he was literally knocked over by the ball. I mean, kudos for the much needed comedy interludes but he’s on a DP salary!

And yet for all that ineptitude a goalless draw may not be that bad a result and maybe Robinson was thinking back to the playoff series against Portland two seasons ago when he played for the same result in Portland but then got burned by the away goal back at BC Place?

One good set-piece, one Seattle error and Vancouver are very much in the box seat on Thursday evening.

But it’s just that sometimes it would be nice to have a coach who wasn’t quite so prosaic, wasn’t quite so afraid of letting his players play and wasn’t quite so entangled in the belief that both him and his team are overcoming insurmountable odds in every game.

A coach who wanted his team to rise to the big occasion every once in a while and not suffocate it under the pillow of a crowded midfield.

Of course we long suffering supporters aren’t the ones who really need the sympathy tonight; that should all be directed toward whoever has to put together the twenty-minute highlight package for that game (or even the four-minute highlight package to be honest).

Spare a thought for their souls.

Time for the Soccer Shorts play ratings.

Marinovic-5.5, Nerwinski-5.5, de Jong-5.5, Waston-5.5, Parker-5.5, Ghazal-5.5*, Tchani-5, Shea-3, Bolaños-5.5, Montero-5.5

 

Two legs good, one leg bad?

So how do we feel about the away goals rule?

Like the penalty shootout it’s one of those quirks of soccer that people often complain about without ever offering up a better alternative.

First introduced in the sixties as a way of mitigating against the difficulty of travel for teams traversing across Europe the influence it has had on games has gradually evolved over the years to the extent that it’s now often the home team who are happy to come away with a scoreless result in the first leg knowing full well that a single goal will carry so much more extra weight in the return.

So a rule designed to persuade visiting teams to attack became a rule that persuaded home teams to defend.

Unintended consequences indeed.

Ironically Major League Soccer is a league in which the away goals rule contains a glimmer of its original purpose given the travel distances involved but equally ironically that doesn’t apply to the upcoming contest between the Vancouver Whitecaps and the Seattle Sounders at all.

So how does Carl Robinson approach the first leg at BC Place on Sunday afternoon?

I suspect that if you offered him a scoreless draw right now he would take it (although he would probably always take a scoreless draw in any game so that point is somewhat moot).

But the chance to go to Seattle knowing that a single goal (say from, oh I don’t know, a set-piece for example?) would force the Sounders to try for two and thus leave them open to the counterattack must be a thought that sets Robinson salivating like a hungry bulldog in a meat pie factory (a word to the wise though, try to avoid buying a meat pie that has been made in a factory if you can no matter what any hungry bulldog may tell you).

And that same thought must be circling around Brian Schmetzer’s brain like a Vlasov-Poisson equation endlessly traverses the brain of a slightly drunk Math teacher.

For the Sounder’s coach knows that if his team can sneak a goal at BC Place their task in the return leg becomes so much easier, but he also knows that searching too hard for that goal could leave his team open to the counter-attack he most fears.

The thing he most desires is the very thing that could ultimately destroy him (much like a hungry bulldog in a meat pie factory funnily enough).

And that’s what the away goals rule does to you.

It deliberately makes some goals more important than others and thus it makes the hope and fear surrounding those goals the prime movers in the way both teams approach a game.

So expect a cagey opening period on Sunday which could then blend into a cagey ninety minutes if no breakthrough is made because the more the clock ticks the more that first goal increases in value.

It probably won’t be pretty to watch but every cross, shot or attempted through ball will contain within it the tension inherent in the knowledge that it has the power to transform the direction of the game completely (that’s true at all times of course but it just seems so much more dramatic in this context for some reason).

 

Vancouver Whitecaps set sail in the playoffs

Who are you and what have you done with the Vancouver Whitecaps?

The Whitecaps finally did what they’ve never really threatened to do all season and took an opposition team apart at BC Place as they cruised to a 5-0 victory over the San Jose Earthquakes in the post-season “play in” game on Wednesday evening.

In retrospect the game was only really a cruise for the final thirty minutes because up until that point it had been more of pedalo ride on a park lake; not in any way threatening but not really promising high jinx and parties either.

The first half was stereotypically tense for a playoff game but a Fredy Montero headed goal from a set-piece was enough to give Vancouver the lead at half-time.

The Earthquakes began the second-half with purpose but then a fantastic Cristian Techera free-kick effectively ended their resolve.

Throw in a Kendall Waston tap in (also from a set-piece) and two Nicolas Mezquida strikes and everybody following the home team headed out into the Vancouver night with a song in their heart and a spring in their step.

Perhaps the only real surprise in Carl Robinson’s starting eleven was the inclusion of Christian Bolaños who was particularly poor in Portland but clearly the coach felt the night was made for experience over tactical experimentation and though the Costa Rican didn’t completely cover himself in glory his ability (compulsion?) to slow the game down proved particularly useful once the lead was achieved.

Shout out too to Marcel de Jong who was a frequent outlet on the left side and even offered more than one dangerous foray forward as a nice counterweight to Jake Nerwinski on the right.

The only area of concern from such a great evening is that Yordy Reyna followed up his own poor performance against the Timbers with another game where he searched in vain to find his touch and though his set-piece delivery was still top-notch it seems likely the Whitecaps will need at least one moment of magic from Reyna if they are to progress beyond the Seattle Sounders in the next contest.

Can they do that?

Well the worst case scenario is that the club as a whole feel that the elusive playoff win is achievement enough and take their foot off the gas and eye off the ball for the next two games.

The best case scenario is that they use this win as a springboard to even better things.

And, for a few hours at least, we’re all allowed to believe that the best case scenario is entirely possible.

Time for the Soccer Shorts player ratings.

Marinovic-6, Nerwinski-6, de Jong-6.5, Waston-6.5, Parker-6, Ghazal-6, Tchani-5.5, Bolaños-6, Techera-6, Reyna-5.5, Montero-6, (Mezquida-6.5, Shea-6) 

 

 

Vancouver Whitecaaaaghps!

The Vancouver Whitecaps played the majority of their 2-1 defeat to the Portland Timbers at Providence Park like eleven men who had never played together in a competitive game before.

Which, funnily enough, is exactly what they were.

Carl Robinson decided that the crucial final game of the regular season was the ideal opportunity to switch things up once again by making a number of changes in the midfield and up front.

Maybe it’s worth analyzing what they were and why they were tried but ultimately they were the actions of a coach who either doesn’t know what his first eleven is or one who thinks his players are so interchangeable it doesn’t matter who he puts on the team sheet.

“He doesn’t” and “it does” are probably the correct answers to those two queries and despite a flurry of attacks at the end of the game (it’s so easy to produce “a flurry of attacks” when you desperately have to, it’s so much harder to do so when it’s easier and safer to just sit back) the Whitecaps were outclassed and out passed.

Portland’s Caleb Porter may not be the most sophisticated footballing brain in the league but he does at least know how to set up a team to get the best out of his best players.

Robinson’s philosophy is always more concerned with stopping the opposition than freeing the talent in his own side.

Hard to say how dispiriting that must be for the players of genuine quality in the squad.

The coach can’t be blamed for how poor his players played overall I suppose with nobody (literally nobody) having an impressive game but he must have been most concerned with the performance of Stefan Marinovic who was arguably at fault for both of Portland’s goals.

Robinson can’t drop him now though because it’s not clear that David Ousted is mentally prepared to play again this season and it would be a stunning vote of no confidence in the player pencilled in to be the number one next year.

Who knows what eleven will be selected for the one off play in game against San Jose but one thing is for sure.

There’s no second chances after this one, no post game interviews that can insist that the character of the squad is strong and that they will bounce back.

It’s win or go home.

Perhaps that will bring the best out of a coach and a team that oh so frequently fails to deliver when it really matters?

But don’t get your hopes up on that.

Time for the Soccer Shorts player ratings.

Marinovic-4.5, Nerwinski-5, Harvey-5, Waston-5*, Parker-5, Ghazal-5, Nosa-5, Shea-4.5, Bolaños-4, Reyna-4.5, Ibini-4

 

Stick or twist for the Vancouver Whitecaps?

Like many of those who attended the disappointing 1-1 tie with the San Jose Earthquakes on Sunday afternoon I tried to take the edge off the old familiar weltschmerz by wandering into the recently opened casino/hotel complex/urban resort situated next to BC Place.

Somewhat surprisingly the clang of rampant capitalism, the glare of neon and the painted on smile of phony bonhomie did little to assuage the existential dread that seeped deeper and deeper into what remained of my soul.

I did win a dollar fifty on the “Neptune’s Quest” slots though so the detour wasn’t a complete waste of time.

But as I was leaving, taking care to avoid looking too intensely into the cold reflectionless eyes of my fellow thrill seekers lest the combined negativity force each of us to implode like the collapsing stars that created us, my thoughts turned to the final game of the Vancouver Whitecaps season.

A suddenly crucial visit to the Portland Timbers .

If you’re reading this then you probably already know the permutations for that game but let’s recap for those at the back.

A win or a tie and the Whitecaps avoid the one game “play in” game and go straight to a two leg series with a week of rest as an added bonus.

But if they lose (and the Sounders beat Colorado in Seattle) then it’s two days of rest, the “play in” game and barely any time to breathe if they win that one.

And the question for Carl Robinson isn’t whether he gambles on the lineup for the visit to Portland, it’s more what he thinks the gamble actually is.

Play his first choice eleven and avoid defeat and it’s all gravy.

But play his first choice eleven and lose then suddenly that gravy is a very different kettle of fish because he now has a tired team going into a genuine “must win” game against an opponent who will probably be far happier to be there than Vancouver will.

And is it inconceivable that a Kendall Waston, a Yordy Reyna (or just about anybody) could pick up a red card in the heat of a season defining local derby?

No it isn’t.

So suddenly the coach could be facing a game he has to win with a squad without rest and at least one key player missing due to suspension.

So does he switch things around and field a slightly weaker team in Portland?

He’s done such a thing already this season.

In Seattle to disastrous effect, in Dallas to triumphant effect and if he does just that and it pays off then that aforementioned kettle of fish is still different but in a “Catch of the Day” kind of a way rather than a “That should be thrown back immediately” kind of a way.

The smart money would still be on Robinson fielding his best team, but both he and us will be watching the game with even more trepidation than usual because the chances are that whichever team comes away from a bruising derby game beaten, bloody and bowed will be staggering into the first few minutes of Wednesday’s game still not quite knowing where they are or how they even got there.

And no “urban resort’ in the world can put a positive spin on that (or on anything really).

Whitecaps fail to press home their advantage

The final home game of the Vancouver Whitecaps regular season turned out to be the perfect distillation of Carl Robinson’s coaching philosophy.

Call it “fine lines” if you want to, but really it’s about creating a game state in which the team will possibly win but, more importantly, probably not lose.

That’s worked well over the regular season with the odd bounce here and there determining the difference between a top two or a top six finish, but as we found out two years ago in the playoffs it really doesn’t work so well when a win is needed.

That’s because there’s no extra gear to turn to, no change of pace or plan to throw the opposition off balance and that’s what was missing in the 1-1 tie with the Earthquakes on Sunday afternoon at BC Place.

The Whitecaps got a precious first half lead thanks to a well worked goal involving Techera, Nerwinski and a Reyna finish but the second half  was all about San Jose pressing forward and Vancouver looking to hit on the break.

Robinson will probably point to the chances his team missed in that second period but if you live by the sword of fine lines you will eventually die by it too.

The visitors inevitably drew level and, apart from a five minutes surge of desperation at the end, the Whitecaps offered nothing to indicate they could turn the game around.

Put that down to the insistence on maintaining two central midfielders who aren’t capable of getting forward or playing incisive passes (and in the case of Tony Tchani often not capable of playing simple passes) and the decision to once again use Alphonso Davies as the first substitute when he’s offered nothing of attacking value since his appearance in the Gold Cup.

Robinson may have a legitimate reason to want his players to play by the numbers but that shouldn’t mean his coaching decisions have to be equally unimaginative and predictable.

In the end the Whitecaps hung on for a point and no doubt retired to the locker room to discover that their Cascadian rivals had each won their own important home games by the score of four goals to nil.

No way the Whitecaps are going to be lulled into that kind of goal scoring madness but the way they once again retreated into the shell of defensive passivity when the game was on the line bodes ill for next week’s trip to Portland.

Lose that and they face the home “play in” game that seemed impossible to achieve just a couple of weeks ago.

Robinson was at least brave in making the decision to replace Ousted and Harvey with the more in form Marinovic and de Jong,  but that courage counts for nought if the whole ethos of the team remains the same.

Who knows what dramas and horrors await us in the next couple of weeks but we can at least enjoy the rich irony of knowing that Robinson’s inherent caution is once again the very thing that has imperilled the chances of his team.

And what’s the point of sport if it’s not to enjoy rich, rich irony?

Time for the Soccer Shorts player ratings.

Marinovic-6.5, de Jong-6, Parker-6, Waston-6, Nerwinski-6, Ghazal-5.5, Tchani-4.5, Techera-5.5, Shea-5.5, Reyna-6, Montero-6

 

Which player is essential to the Whitecaps?

So if you had to name the one player the Whitecaps won’t be able to do without during the playoffs who would it be?

Take your time.

Not that much time!

Whatever player you named I’m guessing that you gave both the right and the wrong answer.

“But how can that be?” you ask, while simultaneously wondering when the hell I will get to the point.

Well impatient reader it can be because there are multiple right answers or, more specifically, there’s only one right answer but with multiple right answers contained within it.

And of those multiple right answers one is divided in half and the other has a question mark hanging over it.

This is quite the mystery isn’t it!

But fear not because I feel this is the right time to reveal the answer to the riddle for the simple reason that I have now padded the opening of this piece enough to give the whole thing the illusion of substance.

So, to put it briefly, the Whitecaps don’t have one player who has to be play for them to be a success they have four and, in addition to that, they have half a player in the form of two and one other player who we can’t quite be sure of yet.

Was that brief? It felt brief when I started out but then seemed to take on a life of its own as I went on.

To the bullet points!

Fredy Montero has to play- When the only other options are Hurtado or Ibini/Shea playing out of position it’s clear the Colombian is integral to the team.

He’s the best goalscorer, the best at holding up play and the best at linking up play so without him they are nothing.

Yordy Reyna has to play- Without Reyna the Whitecaps lack any kind of creative spark, but with Reyna there’s always the chance of something happening.

There’s the whiff of Luis Suarez about the Peruvian given that he always seems to be involved in the game for good or for ill and he’s become the straw that stirs the Whitecaps attacking drink and his absence from the postseason would be the final one (straw).

Kendall Waston has to play- Waston has bounced back from a poor season in 2016 to become an essential component this.

Tim Parker has been showing signs of defensive anxiety lately so having the big Costa Rican alongside him is essential if the surprisingly porous Whitecaps defence wants to avoid the kind of first leg defeat that would make any second leg a heartbreaking formality.

Jake Nerwinski has to play- Who would have seen this one coming at the start of the year? It’s not that Nerwinski has been so stellar, it’s just that his counterpart Sheanon Williams has seen his form fall off a cliff.

The left back position has a couple of acceptable options in Harvey and de Jong but the right back role is down to one man or nothing.

One of Cristian Techera or Christian Bolaños has to play- This is the “half” an essential player we spoke of earlier (well I spoke of it, you probably just skipped straight to the bullet points).

I’m coming around to thinking that these two may be the best wide options from the start anyway but they are certainly the best set-piece takers in the team.

And given that set-pieces have so often been the life blood for Vancouver this year having somebody on the field who can be relied upon for good delivery is a must.

Aly Ghazal must play?- And now to the ? player.

We just haven’t seen enough of Ghazal to definitively say that he has to start but we have seen enough to know that he’s the only player who seems to enjoy playing in the purely defensive midfield role.

Jacobson, Teibert, Tchani and de Jong can all do it to some extent, but having Ghazal in front of the back four certainly feels like a reassuring necessity right now.

The good news with all this is that (injuries aside) all of the above probably will be starting come the first game of the post-season.

The bad news is that having half your team as essential starters really does make a coach worryingly at risk to the vagaries of the soccer gods.

Start praying to them now!